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View Full Version : Story about my Chapter, please let me know if it's any good



Vaya
25-09-2005, 20:05
“For the Emperor! With me, my brothers!”

The Ork looking up towards the sound of the battle cries had little time to take into account what he saw. With a mighty swipe, his head was knocked from his shoulders.
Chaplain Balthazar Malthus landed, his jump-pack still steaming from the short flight into the new Ork mob. All around him, his Death Company thumped down to the ground, immediately pulling their chainswords free and hacking into the surprised greenskins.

Three whole days! And still they were fighting at the outskirts of Taurian. The Orks kept coming, fighting and dying. And then more, and more, and more. They sustained massive losses, but just wouldn’t decrease in numbers. Malthus had encountered Orks before, but never a mass of this magnitude.
Still the defenders held out. All because of the ingenious defence line his Captain constructed. In the short time they had had before the Ork assault on Taurian, Captain Vaya’s plans for the defence of the city had been laid down and prepared. By creating bottlenecks and trenches between the giant hab-blocks, the Orks were forced into fire corridors and shredded to pieces before they reached the guns and the men firing them.

Malthus hammered his Crozius down on another Ork skull, while pumping a few rounds of bolts into the thick of the mob. Swirling around, he was just in time to block a massive axe from burrowing into his neck. At point blank range he shot the Ork through its left eye. Bright red blood splattered against his visors. Wiping it away, he was just in time to see Brother Jael receive a fatal blow and falling at the feet of a massive Ork. Clearly the mob leader. Malthus didn’t hesitate and hurled himself forward.

The first day of the onslaught, all went according to plan. The Orks could only employ their artillery against the face of the hab-blocks. A lucky shot sometimes managed to do some damage, but nearly significant. The planetary defence force did far more damage. The men of the Zontian Guard and especially the battle cannons of the Taurian 12th made thousands of casualties among the invading monsters. But they just kept coming.
By day two the defenders were already running out of ammo. Most of the troopers couldn’t stand up straight after being awake for such a long time. The Ork artillery had brought down a couple of blocks, giving them enough cover to advance and finally assault some points of the defence line. And that’s where Malthus and his men came in.

‘Hold the line!’ the Chaplain bellowed, as yet another of his men crumpled under the blows of several giant blunt machete-like weapons. With a growl, Malthus fired the thrusters on his pack, jetting forward and thus giving him enough speed to throw the Nob from its feet. The Ork tried to get up again, but Malthus was already on top of it, whacking his Crozius three inches into its face. The beast jerked as it drew its final breath, but the Chaplain was already heading for his next victim.

The third day of fighting, and still no reinforcements or help from the rest of the Chapter. This troubled Malthus, because it indicated that his Captain had finally taken things too far. Malthus wasn’t at all displeased with the sometimes extreme methods Vaya had taken. But on the other hand many considered the Chaplain even worse than his Captain. He couldn’t say this bothered him, as long as the fighting continued and the Chapter was victorious. And now, the latter was unsure…

Gunning down one Ork and breaking the back of another, Malthus saw Brother Danson fall; blood gushing from what once was the right side of his head. Turning around, the Chaplain saw nothing but Orks. With a loud curse, he fired his pack again and jumped up to a higher part of the ruined hab-block he was currently fighting on. Where were his Brothers? Everywhere he looked, the defence line was being breached. The trenches were overrun by Orks, and the Zontian Guard simply lacked the fighting skill to stop the Orks in hand-to-hand combat. This was not good. Not good at all.

Malthus had never panicked before, and wasn’t planning to start doing so now. The Chaplain did the only thing he could do. He retreated. Evading large mobs of Orks and cursing himself for doing such a cowardly thing, Malthus boosted from one piece of cover to another, making sure he didn’t cross any line of fire or land amidst the enemy. Heading for the command post seemed to be the sanest thing to do now.

As he triggered the pack for the final boost, a Thunderhawk suddenly seared overhead, making a sharp turn and landing next to what was once the command post. The central square of Taurian, with all its fortifications, communication relays and weaponry, lay in waste. Apparently hit by a huge piece of artillery, bodies lay scattered everywhere. Amidst the smouldering heaps, Rüte was towing the limp body of the Captain towards the gunship. Malthus didn’t waver a second, and sprinted down the square to assist the Sanguinary High Priest.

“Wolfgang! What happened!”, the Chaplain bellowed, as he grabbed hold of Vaya’s legs. The High Priest looked up, first not recognising the black clad figure and almost dropping his Captain while reaching for his pistol. If only for a second. “Balthazar, Emperor be praised. Please help me save him. We’re not too late. But hurry!”

The Chaplain nodded. He helped the High Priest carry their Captain up the ramp of the Thunderhawk. “We’re clear! Get us the hell out of this place!” Malthus yelled at the pilot. The Thunderhawk rose just in time, as the first mobs of Orks came rushing onto the square. It quickly ascended, leaving the city of Taurian and the planet of Zont 84 behind.

mirakel_jocke
25-09-2005, 20:27
Pretty nice story you have made there.

The only complaint I have is that I feel that the story could have been a bit longer.

Don't stop writing, you have some talent in there Vaya.

/Mirakel_Jocke

Zman3382
25-09-2005, 21:16
Entertaining. What happens next?

Vaya
25-09-2005, 21:26
Well, to give a short relay of what this is all about:

I've created a Blood Angel successor chapter, called the Vayan Angels. They come into existance because Captain Vaya is a bit of a loose cannon. As are some of his men. The Blood Angel High Council isn't that pleased and send them on a sort of redeeming campaign to Zont 84. Needless to say things go bad.

What happens next is that Vaya and his men get exiled, but escape and form their own rogue chapter. But that's all stuff for the future...