PDA

View Full Version : Seraphim drawing



Ophidicus
07-12-2005, 16:03
I was going to enter this into the GD art competition, but I overslept. Bugger. Oh well, flying lady. Enjoy.

malika
07-12-2005, 16:14
I love the Chaos Space Marines, your sister needs a bit of work...perspectives and the face (looks a bit manly for some reason)

Oh yeah check your PM!!!

Ophidicus
07-12-2005, 16:23
"Perspectives and the face (looks a bit manly for some reason)"
That doesn't help much. Personally, I think she looks a little too wide, especially on the legs. The face looks manly 'cos I used too much ink on the jaw, and bodged the cheekbone shadows. I'm not 100% happy with this either, I don't expect anyone else to be. The idea is that she's twisting whilst leaping backward to escape, it's a sod of pose. Oh well, I'll keep trying.

Zapp Brannigan
07-12-2005, 18:31
I think her size is fine, but her face does need a change to look more feminine. There's something about the dying Chaos Space Marine that I don't love, but the one with the bolter looks breathtaking, and the other one looks really good (though all you can see is the head). Perhaps in the background you could add a bit more action too. Maybe.

Luke
14-12-2005, 10:52
i feel the pose on the "getting shot" marine is weak. its too static and there is a problem with proportion that can be rectified by working more loosely with your medium.

the face on the sister isnt too bad but it does look manly, the width of the face and harsh angular features do not help.

aside from that you have a nice style and i would love to see more of your stuff

Ophidicus
14-12-2005, 17:52
I thought the problem with him was that he wasn't actually getting shot, the gun doesn't actually seem to be loaded. What's wrong with the pose and proportions? I thought I had that guy spot on. Gimme some real crit dagnabbit!? [/frustration] :)

Luke
14-12-2005, 19:41
that is crit, i studied art/art and design/design/3d design for 6 years :D

the head of the beserker looks far too small and he looks like he has been hit by a tazer and gone rigid.

Izram
14-12-2005, 20:04
Critisism mode on

The Sister is all out of proportion, especially the torso in comparasion to the legs. The legs themselves are awkwardly posed, especially her right leg.
the marine getting shot with blanks has a boring poses, albiet nothing too wrong with him. i think you need to work on arms though, he looks like hes got a toothpaste tube arm. needs more elbow. A smaller nitpick about his axe, it has no dimension, looks paper thin. His right leg must be real short to be in that position too. Adds odd perspective to him.

Back the the sister; you said it already but it bears repeating, she is a little thick. the problem with her face looking mannish is probably due to the short hair and the daemonicaly thick brow and jagged jaw line. She could use much softer features, and yes, I understand it can be difficult in the medium.

The bend in her arm makes her look a bit gangly, like the strawman. A thick a straighter sword arm would fix the odd look.

The face could do with being a bittle longer as well.

If she is a seraphim, where is her jetpack? I think it would do a lot for the picture if that were add/enlarged. It adds mass to the upper body, making her legs look even slimmer.

Also, the architechture coudl use more defining. What i mean is, I can;t see where one part ends and another begins and it looks confusing and busy. keep in mind the viewer can't see into your mind and things need to be simplified a bit.

My favorite part is the marine in the middle, but what is he shooting? and where are the spent shells?

critisism mode off

Nice work

Ophidicus
14-12-2005, 23:18
Luke: That's not criticism, that's just rhetoric, and I've got plenty of me own, thankyeverymuch.

Izram: Thanks, this is what I need. Righto:

>>The Sister is all out of proportion, especially the torso in comparasion to the legs. The legs themselves are awkwardly posed, especially her right leg.
<<Yep, she is. As I've mentioned, it's a very awkward pose, leaping backward and turning (and now I think about it, I'm not even sure it's possible with a jump pack). Actually, I think the main thing that messes it up is the head, it's too big and too high up. That's what really sets it off. I'll be sure to make the legs longer next time too.

>>The marine getting shot with blanks has a boring poses, albiet nothing too wrong with him. i think you need to work on arms though, he looks like hes got a toothpaste tube arm. needs more elbow. A smaller nitpick about his axe, it has no dimension, looks paper thin. His right leg must be real short to be in that position too. Adds odd perspective to him.
<<Boring pose? If you say so. He isn't exactly the protagonist. More elbow, gocha. Yep, I can see the shading isn't very well defined in that area. Axe I was deliberately making thin, but given the stature of the figure itself, it does look pretty slim. Generally blades aren't that thick, but I suppose a chap that strong would need a bit more 'chop'. I think his leg's fine, it's just masked by the bolter. He's stepping forward, up a step or three.

>>Back the the sister; you said it already but it bears repeating, she is a little thick. the problem with her face looking mannish is probably due to the short hair and the daemonicaly thick brow and jagged jaw line. She could use much softer features, and yes, I understand it can be difficult in the medium.
<<Covered.

>>The bend in her arm makes her look a bit gangly, like the strawman. A thick a straighter sword arm would fix the odd look.
<<Yep, it'd look more natural as it's balance the straight (**** poor) pistol arm, but making it thicker would make her look too space marine. Given that I should make the rest thinner, I doubt that would work.

>>The face could do with being a bittle longer as well.
<<Goddamnit enough about the flippin' face!!

>>If she is a seraphim, where is her jetpack? I think it would do a lot for the picture if that were add/enlarged. It adds mass to the upper body, making her legs look even slimmer.
<<Hokay, bigger pack. More of a winged look too, I fancy.

>>Also, the architechture could use more defining. What i mean is, I can't see where one part ends and another begins and it looks confusing and busy. keep in mind the viewer can't see into your mind and things need to be simplified a bit.
<<I see, I hadn't noticed that before. You've probably guessed it's a ruined bridge, but looking from a distance, the foreground needs to be much darker (perhaps lit with a little muzzle flare) and the background a little lighter. Now that you draw me to it, it looks a little bit MC Escher, the background overlapping the fore.

>>My favorite part is the marine in the middle, but what is he shooting? and where are the spent shells?
<<Well, he's not really. You'd think his attention would have been on the flying lass, but no. Maybe I wanted to create the impression there was more going on in the area, or maybe I madfe that up just now. There is, however, most definitely a spent shell.

<<Nice work
>>Cheers! I'll keep at it. Thanks for the *proper* criticism. *glares at Luke :P

Zabuza
16-12-2005, 05:16
well....I like it. Tis better than I could do.

but that face......maybe it just needs more detail. And some tender loving care.

Ophidicus
16-12-2005, 05:42
And none of that 'war' business, eh? Poor thing.