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Shuya
05-05-2005, 14:46
Shuya is in desperate need of help.
I have this auntie who is coming to stay for along time she wants to see my grandmother. This is ok with me as my auntie is a cool person who i like alot more than my own mother. The problem lies in who she is brining.

Her son is coming with her and this is my problem,

he is 16 yet he has the mental age of a child (i am certain he acts like it somtimes on purpose). And sofar since birth he has.


Been taken into then released from a mental institute (he was kicked out)
he destroyed his own house because his mum said he couldnt have another rabbit (guess what happend to the first)
He broke down a door to get to his first rabbit (his mum locked the rabbit in there for its own saftey
he drowned the rabbit
he killed a hamster after sliding it about the room in a shoe
he through a pair of scissors at my brother (and my brother got blamed for this)
he stole from us
he cut the tags of most of my mothers beanie babies (though this sounds silly without tags there worthless and i was planning to sell them on ebay for cash one day)(she has over 400)
he has broken 2 ps2s (both mine as i wouldnt let him use my game while i went out)

i know this is a long hard to read post, but i despratly need help. If i touch him he cries and i get in trouble, but he can and will break all my models and my game systems and my grandmother will let him. I dont know how to deal with him, because if i tell him not to touch my stuff heel either, do it anyway or tell my gran who will say "go on use it, im sure he wont mind" so what can i do to solve this problem because even if he breaks stuff heel be let back next year to break more stufff

so PLEASE help me if i allow him to use my stuff he breaks it if i dont he breaks it.

:0)
05-05-2005, 14:53
Lock your door. Only go out when he's not around, and if he breaks down the door, that's the only evidence you need to show that it was not your fault he broke your things.

Shuya
05-05-2005, 14:55
i have to let him in as he comes with his auntie witch my gran will let in

and i have to go to school as its my last two weeks.

Delicious Soy
05-05-2005, 14:58
I think the solution is obvious. Bury him up to his head in the backyard. Throw a trap over it if he get rowdy. :p

Seriously I don't know how much you can do other than secure all your stuff away while he's there. You may not be able to use it, but least it'll all be safe.

Sgt John Keel
05-05-2005, 15:00
Set a price tag on everything. Tell his mother: 'he breaks, you pay'. Be sure to put an overprice on all you models, counting about 6/hour you spent on them.

Nevertheless, why are your grandmother able to decide about your stuff? Even if you feel bad about it, tell her the cold hard truth. Tell her you do mind. It have to be worth it.

/Adrian

The Phoenix
05-05-2005, 15:06
Bring anything you are especially worried about (namely your figs and video game systems) to a friend of yours' house. Leave them there, they shouldn't take up much space, unless you have A LOT of stuf. Ideally leave your stuff at a friend's house who plays warhammer / 40K / LotR / whatever it is you play, since you can't play alone, you can just go have a game with him when you want to play.

If granny gives you flak, just tell her you're worried that your stuff might get broken. If she says it'll be fine, suggest she also let the brat play with her fine china / jewlery / other valuable thing that wouldn't be too hard to damage or loose. Just don't be a smart ass about it, be very, very sincere about your concens.

-Phoenix

anarchistica
05-05-2005, 15:35
If you wanna keep him from breaking your stuff and he won't comply, cut off one of his fingers. The little one. Then you tell 'im his thumb's next.

That might just work on bank managers who won't tell you the combination of the vault though. :D

Seriously, make sure those involved know of what he does. Make sure they know they're gonna pay for anything he breaks. If they won't, just steal it from them because they're a bunch of feths.

If you're stronger than this feller you can just threaten him, hurt him, etc. You'd be surprised how well physical violence works. If anyone gives you flak, say he started it or just take the flak, it can hardly be worse than having your stuff destroyed.

salty
05-05-2005, 16:02
I agree with Sgt John Keel, if he damages ANYTHING, even so small as snapping off a chainsword, make his mother pay up! And tell her beforehand too, exactly how much this stuff is worth.

Also, how tall is he? If he is a short little runt, hide your stuff on top of a wardrobe or something and make sure he can't climb up to get at it (this is where my games are after several models were knocked flying repeatedly by my cat.

Other than that, and I don't normally condone violence, just beat his ass into submission. It'd be worth the earache if it saved your models!

Salty :)

Brother Munro
05-05-2005, 16:03
Just remove your stuff to a friends house as the Pheonix suggested, then make it quite clear your room and stuff is off limits. Set up booby traps (punji pits, claymore mines, the ususal) then practice looking innocent and saying 'I did warn him..." ;) :D :evilgrin:

worldshatterer
05-05-2005, 16:09
it really is a matter of box your stuff up and take it to a friends, if for whatever reason your family stop you then its a simple matter of calling the police when something gets broken and your relatives won't pay for it, nobody should get charged with something but the very threat especially if the kids been in a mental institute will whip your relatives onto the straight and narrow very quickly . You may discover that suddenly your aunt isn't very cool anymore, and your grannie can be a mean old cow for spoiling her relationship with relatives, this is the cost of asserting yourself and is the only true way to get them to respect you.

Much as the violent solution sounds appealing- it sounds like this relative has some real mental problems, vs people like that sure you can hit them it will probably stop them but they'll be back breaking your stuff in 5 minutes[i have an autistic brother and i often give him a clip round the ear when he does stuff i know he knows he shouldn't do- like breaking my stuff, but it still doesn't stop him doing it again]. All you can do is box it up and get it out of the house and be glad you don't have to live with them on a day to day basis for very long .

EVIL INC
05-05-2005, 16:11
Bring anything you are especially worried about (namely your figs and video game systems) to a friend of yours' house. Leave them there, they shouldn't take up much space, unless you have A LOT of stuf. Ideally leave your stuff at a friend's house who plays warhammer / 40K / LotR / whatever it is you play, since you can't play alone, you can just go have a game with him when you want to play.
-Phoenix
This seems like the best option for you to use. While the others sound good and you may actuall WANT to do them, they can only lead to worse problems. Same goes for threatening him if he does anything. He will call your bluff and you will either have to follow through and get in worse trouble or he will know your bluffing.
Other options include calling your aunt and explaining your concerns to her. She might be able to help out by telling your gran to not let him into your room. With her and you both telling your gran that, she might not let him in. Dont tell her about it in a "kid way" make sure your explain to her the cash value of your stuff and what it means to you especially with the hours of work you put into it.
Another option is to leave dummies. Stuff that is crap and you dont care about out to distract him from the "good stuff".

I understand your situation. My buddy has a fully autistic son (he uses the dummy techique. the son has his OWN miniatures), my sister has a partially autistic son and my cousin who is 40 has the mental capicity of a 12 year old. And trust me, no threats can stop this man, he has a black belt through military school as well as being an excellent kickboxer. That sort of thing has helped him learn disciplin fortunately so he isnt as bad as you might think. However, the principle is the same. I myself, am partially autistic just as my nephew is and I was also given dummy stuff to keep me out of other people's. well, that and I was beaten a lot if I misbehaved. ;)

salty
05-05-2005, 16:12
Do you have any storage space? When my cousins are coming I stash all my stuff under the eaves in our attic, then slide the bolts back and block the doors off with boxes etc.

You could always try that, assuming of course removing them to a friends house isn't possible.

Salty :)

Wraith
05-05-2005, 16:30
I think the hiding everything in the attic is a great idea -- get some boxes put all your stuff in it and tape it all up and stash it away.

Even better imagining the little sod's face (he's really 16?) when there's nothing he can 'play' with...

Really important stuff could be placed in a backpack and kept with you at all times.

Out of interest what do the adults say/do when you go up to them present a broken item and explain that this has been broken due to little crap's actions?

Adept
05-05-2005, 18:09
The main objective here is stopping your models from getting broken.

If they aren't in the house, he can't break them.

So make sure they aren't in the house.

Simple, really.

tzeentchgiant
05-05-2005, 18:44
Take it to a friends house, only option.

Also remove everything of value and place it in your garage/attic/highest shell, anywhere the brat WOULDN'T look not somewhere that he can't look, because where there's a will there's a way, and when you come home to find a pile of furniture next to scattered shattered minis, it will be on your head, because
"He was just playing" or "you didn't tell him not to can blame you for a stupid kid in any situation.

Other ways of prevention

-Keep him distracted, play games, go to the park, allow him to use other less valuable items
-Don't tell him or warn him that way he won't know they exist, so he won't look for them
-Do as the child pleases, better than loosing all your minis no?

These things will all make said child less inclined towards agravaiting you, deliberately or not.

Also tell his parents about everything (what you've done, what you're donig, what you don't want him to do etc), so that they will try to help, parents will be more effective at controlling him than you (unless they're useless parents) so it's better to have them on side.

TG

The Phoenix
05-05-2005, 19:04
-Don't tell him or warn him that way he won't know they exist, so he won't look for themTGThat is one of the best peices of advice anyone has posted. Course, if he knows you have a playstation / gamecube / atari it won't work, but if he doesn't know you have a couple hundred toy soldiers, it's not likely he'll find them. Unless granny tells him that you play with toy soldiers. Then your'e screwed :p

-Phoenix

Cheesejoff
05-05-2005, 19:33
1. Take all your stuff to a friends house. (Or, bury it in the garden if you don't have friends)

2. Buy loads of stress balls, see him try to break one of those.

3. Give him a red herring. Point him to the sturdiest, most secure container you have and tell him you've left your stuff in there, and he shouldn't touch it. In reality you should fill it with, say, soft toys or something, who cares if they get broken, better that than your arhammer, aye?

4. DO NOT TELL HIM WHERE THE REAL DEAL IS!!!1!!!!

5. Pray that he doesn't read Portent.

*edit*

6. If you're concerned about your CD's being damaged, you could try getting some blank ones and writing on them (or use a label burner if you have one), and hide them somewhere obvious while you hide your real ones somewhere else. He'll probably break the fakes, but...

worldshatterer
05-05-2005, 20:52
You simply cannot risk anything you value being in the house, and you can never be there all the time especially if you go to school . Childish minds will find things however well they are hidden, and adults are worst of all with line such as "he was bord so we gave him some of your stuff to play with" and they will find ways of twisting everything to be your fault if the kid has a disability .

I've spent my teenage years constantly facing the same lines of accusation and arguments from my parents, it really did some serious damage to my relationship with them until i left home . Thats why its so important to get the things you value out of the house, its the only way to maintain a harmonious relationship with your family and to keep your stuff intact .

tzeentchgiant
05-05-2005, 21:09
Thank you mr Pheonix I feel very proud, infact I think i will sig you for that one.

Seriously remove all valuables from the house, if it could be important to you he could break it on purpose to spite you.

TG

Getz
06-05-2005, 06:12
Yup. I gotta agree that you're best course of action is to box up all your valuble stuff and take it to a friends place, or failling that stash it in the attic.

There is no point being confrontational. It'll only make a difficult situation more stressfull. Just get everthing that is valuble to you out of the house and somewhere safe.

Finally, if you Parents are in some way bothered by this, don't throw a strop but instead try to explain as calmly as you can that you're trying to prevent problems before they happen. I, for one, would be impressed by your mature attitude...

fellows
06-05-2005, 07:54
I gotta agree with whoever suggested talking with his guardians and telling them to pay for whatever he breaks. I would take it one step further. Probably on the 2nd night once they are all talkin, sit down and tell them frankly.

"Glad your here ... etc."
"This is something we need to discuss"
" subjectx and myself are now of adult age, it is time we sort things out as such....he needs to take responsibility for his actions and failing that you (the guardians) do.

Honestly, with my little brother i overpower him. Disable his arms usually by stepping on them... look him right in the eye, and set him straight, and/or add a punch in the face/stomache to let him know your not kidding.

Also theirs the oranges in a berlap bag idea. He cant complain about what they cant see :D

Shuya
06-05-2005, 09:16
bloody grandmother, whenever i tell her do not let him touch stuff she just nods and i can tell that means shes not listening,

im certain his mother owes me 32 so far as soon as he got in he started looking through the boxes of my games and then he picked up a box of highelves (in a box not a case, they were drying) and he shook them to find out what was in them then droped them, so i just started a tab. i mean couldnt he just open the lid :O

JarLoz
06-05-2005, 10:47
Well, I don't know about you, but I know what I'd do with a snotty little bastard like that. When he comes around, you take him behind the house, grab his throat and tell him that if anything breaks, it will be his funeral. And if he breaks something, beat his ass.

Seriously, you just need to hide everything. Outside the house, if possible. A nasty trick would be putting some heavy-duty rattraps in your drawers. You know, those big ones that can break fingers? That should teach him a lesson.

And I'm really ashamed that he's 16, as I'm 16 also. I hope that this one crooked bastard doesn't mess your whole view about us teens. :)

Punk_in_Drublic
06-05-2005, 11:03
bloody grandmother, whenever i tell her do not let him touch stuff she just nods and i can tell that means shes not listening,

im certain his mother owes me 32 so far as soon as he got in he started looking through the boxes of my games and then he picked up a box of highelves (in a box not a case, they were drying) and he shook them to find out what was in them then droped them, so i just started a tab. i mean couldnt he just open the lid :O

Why is it so difficult to just get your stuff outta there, like so many people have mentioned?

And why would you even paint and let mini's dry when you know he's bound to screw it up? Just take a break from the hobby, and go hang out with friends whilst he's there. Your grandmother and auntie shouldn't expect you to deal with this mentally disturbed cousin, if all he does is to screw you over. So...just avoid him, if he can't behave, mentally ill or not.

Later,

-Punk

Shuya
07-05-2005, 02:22
Why is it so difficult to just get your stuff outta there, like so many people have mentioned?

And why would you even paint and let mini's dry when you know he's bound to screw it up? Just take a break from the hobby, and go hang out with friends whilst he's there. Your grandmother and auntie shouldn't expect you to deal with this mentally disturbed cousin, if all he does is to screw you over. So...just avoid him, if he can't behave, mentally ill or not.

Later,

-Punk

the thing is i have to go to school and after school stuff so hes in my house doing whatever he wants (my gran will let him) while im not there

im pretty happy, his mum sed she would pay for my stuff if and when he breaks it (because she cant be assed to control him) and he spent all day downstairs sulking because he couldnt complete halo 2 on easy.

couldnt even do the first lvl

problem is my downstairs now smells of excrement (witch is what he smells like 24/7 and smoke

worldshatterer
07-05-2005, 10:50
we understand that you have to go to school, you haven't explained why you can't just move your stuff out of there?

his mum may have said she will pay, adults are very good at making promise like that , then not coughing up when they realise how expensive your stuff is .

tzeentchgiant
07-05-2005, 11:08
It seems like your ok so long as you don't mind repainting some stuff.

But I personnaly would have moved it, avoided the whole mess.

TG

Wraith
07-05-2005, 11:46
his mum may have said she will pay, adults are very good at making promise like that , then not coughing up when they realise how expensive your stuff is.

Very good point.

What worse if you point out just how expensive the 'little metal/plastic man' is the parent may well not believe you (or refuse to believe you) and think you're actually lying to them in an attempt to trick them out of money.

Samoth
07-05-2005, 15:10
Then print off a list of prices from the gw website, at school, if necessary. Seriously shuya, take steps to not let him touch anything, and that will mean putting the hobby on hold for a while.

H2 on easy? How screwed is this kid?

Wraith
07-05-2005, 15:29
Then print off a list of prices from the gw website, at school, if necessary.

This might not always work, I'm 22 but back when I was a kid some adults once their mind is made up will refuse to listen to you, refuse to look at 'evidence', will even punish you for 'back chatting', refuse to listen to reason.

tzeentchgiant
07-05-2005, 16:24
I don't think his Auntie would punish him for "back chatting" if she won't punish her own suck for being a wee ********.

Also as previously stated by Shuya she's a cool Auntie so why would she be so cruel, I think we're all thinking worst case senario, post up all the damage once the brat's reign of terror is over.

TG

The Judge
07-05-2005, 22:13
Reinforced doors.

Or, if a friend is not handy to leave stuff with, find a handy ladder into loft/garden shed nobody would wnat to go in/safe hiding place a rat wouldn't want to go in. It is a case of second guessing what he's thinking, if he is as malicious as he sounds.
As for games, Dvd's, Cd's...perhaps keeping them under a floorboard or in the boot of a car would be a fair idea. How long is he staying?

worldshatterer
07-05-2005, 22:34
Reinforced doors won't solve a thing if the houses owner [i presume the grandmother] will open them for the brat from hell .

@tzeentchgiant, erm, people act very differently towards other peoples children than they do their own . especially if they are the parent of someone mentally disabled/insane they will often view anything negative you say to be you discriminating against their child, as its only natural for you to stick up for own kids .

only by preparing for a worst case scenario can you not get caught out, hell, when everything works out fine you'll even be pleasantly surprised-to think otherwise is to leave yourself open to all kinds of emotional and physical damage .

Shuya
07-05-2005, 23:04
he does like GW (hes one of those childish start and army for 2 days then start another one because he gets bored kinda people) so she knows how mutch it costs.

good news he hasnt found the stuff i hid (its where i keep my money, important stuff and pornography) (scratch that last part) but the hiding space has become smaller since he came round.

Verergoca
07-05-2005, 23:11
Well, seeing as this isnt the dreaded "I just went through my leg with a chainsaw, what should I do?" thread(as I suspected when I opened this thread, it leaves me to wonder...

Why you havent brought the stuff to a friend for temporary storage, its not like you have 6m3 of lead n plastic miniatures, right? ;)

Also, im in favour of leaving rattraps, in nice and bright boxes(lable them with something like this side up/fragile :p ). He sounds like he will take more than a peek....

Good luck dealing with this situation

skavenguy13
08-05-2005, 00:28
hide a little bomb in a "fragile" labelled box:p

Seriously, just hide stuff or REALLY ask your mom not to let him go into your room or else she's in trouble and has to pay the stuff he broke.

Now for some good points: let him find the stuff you want to be replaced.
And 2 easy words: good beating. Just let him feel what it looks like to be on the other side of a punch!

salty
08-05-2005, 00:38
Yeah, good idea. Let him break something small and insignificat (perhaps some of the LotR stuff you shamefully hide under your bed ... :rolleyes: ), then beat him so he knows what will happen if he does it again.


Salty :)

Rabid Bunny 666
08-05-2005, 00:41
move your stuff to a friends, learn what he doesn't like and then get you and your brother, maybe friends to di it alot whilst hes around. belittle him if hes being a s**t and generally treat him badly when hes messing around. its called a reality check ;)

Lostanddamned
08-05-2005, 00:44
All of these people talking about hitting the kid don't know what will happed, at my school there is a kid with ADHD and when he is provoked he will attack will a pure ferocity and force of will that no one can get him away from the target of his attacks.

Do not hurt the kid, it will ruin any argument you had in your defense and could provoke him to do stuff you dont want him to do at all.

Hiding stuff is your best bet, along with talking to the kids parent, preferably after the kid has gone to bed. That helps because 1. he cannot defend himself and 2. it says, I am not a child, the children are in bed. Do not exagurrate the value of your modles but don't downgrade them either, add a fair price such as 3 or 4 dollars to each painted model and 1 or 2 to any unpainted ones. and whatever you do make it clear that it is nothing to do with his disability but to do with his intentional and repeated malicious damage of property.

sigur
08-05-2005, 00:55
okay, I may be a bit drunk, but I fully agree with lostanddamned.

Don't bash him, hide your stuff, talk to his parents. Hide your stuff well. And hide your pr0n well, for Sanguinius' sake!!!!1

Good luck with this one.

magnificent*
08-05-2005, 01:36
Maybe sacrifice a bit for family harmony. I would not spend much money but I would buy things from a 2 dollar store and get some videos to keep him occupied.
It is not fair that he breaks your stuff but put into context. Someone threw out my ENTIRE minature collection and I have no way of making him pay but that is nothing to the aunties stress of having a troubled child or the sympathy pain the gran would feel for the auntie.

tzeentchgiant
08-05-2005, 13:40
@worldshatterer I disagree, I have been around children with mental problems, the ones whose parents send them to scouts and school anyway, some of them really shouldn't be there but the sysmtem allows inclusion so they stay. Gone off topic a bit, but all of their parents seem to accept when their child has done something wrong.

At scouts I hit a guy for being a wee pick and his dad got annoyed, but then found out he had been setting fire to me and changed his tone. Whilst I'm sure there are uber defensive parents out there I don't think he would be coming on a visit if his mother thinks he's always right.

Put it into context his aunt seems fairly cool if she agreed to pay for any breakages so I don't think she would react unnacceptably when shuya presents the bill.

TG