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View Full Version : Repentors (my chapter) give me advice on fluff please



druchii lord narakh
02-09-2009, 04:18
SO as the title states the REPENTORS are my space marine chapter. so far what i have is as follows

we were created from the remanents of a few marines from the traitor legions who stayed loyal to the Emperor. After around 500 years of penatence and observation by the newly formed inquisition we were alowed to become a chapter in secret like how the grey knights were formed.

We have ten companys. each is lead by a company master who weres the ornate armor of the companys founder ( each company was founded by one marine from each traitor legion except the first) the Company masters all have captains under them and are lead by the chapter master.

The current chapter master is Alasto Tor'chalice, called the avatar of the immortal Emperor. This is because he was the first to be inducted into the repentors chapter and even as a initiate he showed a uncanny ability to lead as well as fight in any situation. he recived his name after fighting off four greater Daemons at once, alone and with only his powersword. he was summoned to Terra because across severall systems astropaths had begun to call out his name. there he was allowed to gaze into the eyes of the emperor. o what happend in the throne room none speek of but when he left he bore the armor and weapons of the emperor himself.

The first company has 200 marine veterans. the other nine are comprimized in different and more unique ways. each company other then the first is responsible for recruiting new initiates. Every marine in the chapter is moved form each company after a certain amount of years, usually depends on how the marine learns and acts in that company. This has cause the marines of the repentors to learn to react and fight better even when placed in a squad of marines they have yet to bond with. this also has helped when the Repentors have fought alongside other chapters.

there major drawback is that there oculobe gene in some of the marines slowly becomes sensitive to light, and in some cases so sensitive the marines sees more on a ultraviolet level.
the other drawback is they will fight, even when all the odds pose against it, and they do this to prove not only there loyalty but also as a show of penatence for there lost brother who betrayed the emperor.

there armory consists of more varients of the landraider then any other chapter.

there home world is Anero, located in the Pleuric system, but most of the chapter is fleet based. all except the forth company are fleet based.

there history is filled with tails of selfless herois. some other chapters have such as the Dark Angels have called there actions suicide but to many other chapters its only a willingness to show unflinching loyalty to the imperium.

they have relation to chapters shuch as iron hands, monitors, blood angels, imperial fists and many others.
There have rivalries and are enemies to some chapters like the Dark angels and crimson fists.


well thats all i got. wonder what you all think. open to any opinion

Firaxin
02-09-2009, 04:23
*cough*
No. While there is some degree of coolness behind the idea of a chapter composed of loyalists within the Traitor Legions, you lost me at "when he left he bore the armor and weapons of the Emperor Himself..."

druchii lord narakh
02-09-2009, 04:30
the reason why i posted this is so that i could get the opinion of what people think. so i could alter that and stuff. i mean its not final.

Seth the Dark
02-09-2009, 04:56
I would stay away from making your chapter too cool and powerful. The part where the first Chapter Master fought off 4 greater demons is a little much. But I like your drawbacks as it is always important to make them more "human".

pookie
02-09-2009, 10:19
yay another chapter created from the time of the HH :rolleyes:.

Whats wrong with the 21+ foundings since?

falls in the " trying too hard - but missing the point of self created chapters catagory for me"

druchii lord narakh
02-09-2009, 12:44
The greater Daemoin thing can be cut down and stuff and the reson i made them from the HH is my brother plays chaos marines so i LOATH THEM!!!!! and cause u read that each of the traitor legions had marines within who did not want to traitor and were mostly killed but from what i've read each had some leave.

pookie
02-09-2009, 14:21
The greater Daemoin thing can be cut down and stuff and the reson i made them from the HH is my brother plays chaos marines so i LOATH THEM!!!!! and cause u read that each of the traitor legions had marines within who did not want to traitor and were mostly killed but from what i've read each had some leave.

but you do realise Trator Marines can come from a diffrent period than the HH?

Also yes your right some of the Traitor Legions did have Loyalists, but the only ones we know for certain to survive the Cull of the Legions are the DG who made it back to terra, via the Imperial Fists.

Again i'l ask, whats wrong with the other 21+ foundings? theres info that certain foundings took place with specific foes in mind, why cant you adopt this as the Source of your Chapter? why try and slot them into the History of 40K right from the start?

also why have allies with the Imperial Fists but not the Crimson Fists?

Urath
02-09-2009, 14:48
It's interesting and, don't bash me for this - I know you intend to cut some stuff back, Four Greater Deamons, the weaponary and armour of the Emperor. It is a bit much. I like the scene where the Chapter Master gazes into the eyes of the Emperor.

A nice alternative to the Horus Heresy is the Age of Apostasy.

druchii lord narakh
03-09-2009, 02:43
YES this is what i want. and now that you point it out yeah i know im stickin the chapter in with 40k history. I had a explanation for there being there but not mentioned before because the Repentors like to remain unknown to most except the other marine chapters. and they wernt instated during the first found right after the HH. they had to wait around 500-600 years for them to be alowed to becoe a chapter.
and i had another downfall to them that i forgot and it was that the inquisition is always dogging them. every fleet has a inquisitor of some level with them and this is because of there history before the founding of the chapter ( seing as they were allowed to form by the highlords of terra the inquisition is iffy about it.