View Full Version : Slaggin' Match.

01-07-2010, 10:15
Sparked by another thread, (full credit to spetswalshe) this is a thread where you take sides: Either a High Elf or Dwarf.

Then start slagging the other race off! [Please keep the banter to appropriate levels, no references to High Elves' sexuality/obscene things about Dwarves etc)

I'll set the scene - A High Elven fleet has made its way over to the Old World in an attempt to achieve an alliance with the Wood Elves at the behest of Finubar himself. There are nobles, servants and an escort to protect the amabassadors.

On the way, they camp near a Dwarven brewery, and when the High Elves go hunting on their horses for food in the morning, led by a most arrogant noble, they encounter some Dwarves carrying some tankards of beer, slightly tipsy and with a nasty hangover.

The conversation starts like this (full credit for this line to Spetswalshe):

Noble Lensaine: "Ho there, Dwarf! We're hunting rabbits in these lands. Be a dear and pull one out of it's hole for me, will you? Careful, you might have to bend down a bit... Or not. Watch you don't have to scale any molehills on the way."

Dwarf No1: ...


Please note that there will be no violence in this encounter, if only for the reason that it's difficult to insult your enemy while you are trying to rip his innards out.

01-07-2010, 10:57
Come down to my level an' say that yer barnacled goat lovin oath breaker!

01-07-2010, 17:55
Were I to stoop to your level, your rotten stench might force me to retreat. What's that on your face? Grimy seaweed coats your chin, foulmouthed cretin!

01-07-2010, 22:11
Elgram elgi, you look like a kruti how did you meet the goat that gave you the krut. I would ask ya why you ride a broken steed I thought the creatures dongliz where meant to hang between its legs not sit atop of it. Would ya birdy king like his crown back I believe we still have it!

Elgram, elgi, krut, kruti, are all dwarven words from Khazalid.

Awilla the Hun
02-07-2010, 19:13
Elf-I do not understand the gruntings of degenerate apes, thing down there. Speak up, and speak slowly. But keep your mouth shut; your rancid breath befouls the air.