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ArlandGrimm
05-12-2010, 19:59
Well this is more of a character development for me but thought it was a pretty good short story so tell me wat ye think :)


All it took was one false move, that was it. And he would be lost to the gaping dark of the warp. The ways of the empyrean were myriad and each one dangerous, even for one who had been trained vigorously like Gaicius, there was always a risk.
Gaicius’ brow furrowed, he could feel… something moving about in the murky depths, something, evil. He was jerked back to his body; and let a gasp escape his mouth as the figure of the god emperor of mankind, before which he was knelt, fell to the ground shattering into four equal pieces.
He snapped upwards as the warding scroll that had been placed inside, combusted and reduced itself to cinders. He could feel something evil stirring just outside realspace. He grasped the gothic I strung round his neck. And muttered a prayer of warding
As quickly as it came, it disappeared, into nothingness. He bent down and picked up the broken pieces of the emperor. And rubbed his hand through the ashes. The line of purity studs on his outer lobe began to burn. He quickly drew his hand back and signalled to his servitor to dispose of them.
Walking slowly to a basin in the corner he splashed the cold water over his face, and studied his reflection. He had been working to hard, his eyes were surrounded by black rings, he brushed his hair from his left eye, it had been replaced by a less sophisticated version of the hologothic display found in the hallowed suits of the Adaptus Astartes.
The right side of his head was shaven and sported sprawling prayers and wards in elegant high gothic, whilst the hair on his left side reached down to his shoulders and covered half of his face.
“Damantes?” as he spoke a shadow detached itself from the dark and presented itself before the inquisitor, when the man spoke, he spoke each word with careful pretence; “Yes Gaicius?” Gaicius turned to face the figure, “Did you see what transpired here.”
The assassin looked to the ground, “Yes Lord a grave omen indeed.” Gaicius nodded and turn his back on his protégé. As a child Damantes had been trained on a death world as what the locals called a “shade” he was torn from his parents at a young age and forced to survive without contact with anyone, when he returned he was changed from the scrawny urchin boy to a paragon of Imperial justice.
Gaicius met him whilst cleansing a chaos cult in his district, and sensing his untapped mental abilities as well as his obvious skills in remaining below the scope as it were took him on as his Acolyte.
“How far are we from Jangarl?” Gacius questioned. Damantes peered out of the sprawling window, into the churning abyss of the warp, “Three hours lord.” He breathed.
Gacius strode to a small desk and pulled open a drawer, and taking from within it a master crafted revolver, it had been a gift from an old friend, Lysander Darrow, an imperial commissioner, the handle was made of glistening silver as was the barrel, but the muzzle had been shaped into the imperial aquilla, the wings cascading down either side towards the trigger.
“Should I tell Librarian Kanath?” inquired Damantes, Gacius turned gripping his bolter tight, “Yes friend and make haste, I feel a cloud hanging over this expedition, like a storm brewing on the edge of reality.”
Damantes nodded; “Indeed, we should tread carefully.” Gacius nodded and gestured for his protégé to leave. Once he heard the metal iris close behind him he opened the drawer once more and withdrew an old book, sprawling golden letters adorned the leather bound cover, Lecitio Divinatus. He stowed it in his robes and returned to his meditation, in preparation for the battle to come.

Exitas-Acta-Probat
07-12-2010, 16:53
not bad - would make a perfect intro for a longer novel. as far as character developement goes i think it was pretty concise. nice work :)

ArlandGrimm
12-12-2010, 18:08
ty :DD working on an extra bit, shoukd have it up soon :)