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alterion
03-06-2005, 21:05
ok folloeiwg on from the best starwars scene i sarted thinking about other short one liners and quips i loved from films.. no essays or extracts a mile long please..
"aaaaacchhhooo.. soory please continue .. i'm allergic to ********" comes to mind from i,robot..

Chuffy
03-06-2005, 21:13
"Aw man, I just shot Marvin in the face..."

ITS A TRAP!

Hideous Loon
03-06-2005, 21:22
Anything Arnie says in the Terminator movies, such as classics as: "Hasta la vista, baby!" Face it. He doesn't talk in those films, except for one-liners.

Or perhaps: "Apology accepted, Captain Needa." (Vader, right after force-choking said Captain to death.)

The Grand Wazoo
03-06-2005, 22:01
"I ain't that good." (after firing a shotgun shell at point-blank range between the eyes of his evil self)

Ash from Army of Darkness.

Kohhna
03-06-2005, 22:11
I could dance with you til the cows come home, or better still, I'll dance with the cows til you go home.

Groucho Marx

Baggers
03-06-2005, 22:27
"I'm Eating" Harrison Ford in Blade Runner

Arnizipal
03-06-2005, 22:29
"Remember I told you I'd kill you last? I lied..."

*drops villian off a cliff*

Arnie in Commando

neXus6
03-06-2005, 23:08
Most of the lines Bruce Campbell has EVER said.
All the Evil Deads and particularly Bubba Ho-Tep spring to mind. :cool:

Ass Goblin
03-06-2005, 23:25
"Remember I told you I'd kill you last? I lied..."

*drops villian off a cliff*

Arnie in Commando

You win! I love that scene. I use the 'I Lied' on all my friends. But I don't drop them off cliffs thoough.

DisruptorX
03-06-2005, 23:34
"Rodents of unusual size? I don't think they exist."

Melchor
03-06-2005, 23:39
And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin.
Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less.
Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three.
Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three.
Five is right out.
Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe,
who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.'


:D And my sig of course...

DisruptorX
03-06-2005, 23:43
"She turned me into a newt!"






"I got better"

Melchor
03-06-2005, 23:45
Pure genius.

Crux
04-06-2005, 00:01
"Jules, haven't you ever heard that once a man admits he's wrong, he's immediately forgiven?"

"Whoever said that never had to pick up itty bitty pieces of skull for your dumb ass! Speaking of which, why am I in the back? You shot him, you should be on brain-detail!"

Kohhna
04-06-2005, 00:23
"I'll go ask"
Ron Perlman in Hellboy

"What would you prefer, yellow spandex?"
Cyclops in X-men

"I have nipples, could you milk me?"
"You tried to milk Jinksy, didn't you Focker?"
De Niro in Meet the Parents

"I have come to kick ass and chew bubblegum, and I'm out of bubblegum"
Roddy Piper in They Live

tzeentchgiant
04-06-2005, 01:07
Comedy, Will Smith in I Robot

"Achoo, I'm sorry I,m allergic to ********."

Something that I say almost everyday, Samual L Jackson, Pulp Fiction

"m m mm, that is one tasty burger"

Something I would love to have the oppertunity to say, Samuel L Jackson, Pulp Fiction

"Ezekeil twenty five seventeen,
That path of the rightous man is bisect on all sides
by the inequties of the weak and the tyranny of evil men
Blessed is he who sheppards my brother through the valley of darkness
for he truely is my brother's keeper, and the finder of lost children
And I will strike down upon thee with furious anger
those who would try to poison and destroy my brothers
And you will know my name is the lord, when I lay my vengence down upon thee"

I think that's all right, but I can't check as it's not actually in the bible.

Correct me if you can

TG

N'bel
04-06-2005, 01:16
A personal favourite is Will Smith in Independance Day:

Punches Alien in the face and says "Welcome to Earth"

Actually, he has a bunch of good ones in that movie.

Kiro
04-06-2005, 01:31
A goody that always gets me:

two weeks....two weeks....two weee...eeeks....two weeeeks!

When Arnie's prosthetic head goes all screwy in Total Recall.

oh yeeeeah :D

Delicious Soy
04-06-2005, 01:58
two weeks....two weeks....two weee...eeeks....two weeeeks!THe amount of times my friends and I work that into conversation is most perturbatory. :p

Some quips

"And now a question of ettiquette, as I pass do I give you the ass or the crotch?" - Tyler Durden Fight Club

"You leader of two thing Jack and ****. And Jack left town." - Ash Army of Darkness

"Uh huh. Thats right. Who's laughing now? WHO'S LAUGHING NOW!!????" - Ash Evil Dead 2

"I'm a mushroom cloud laying motherf*%ker, motherf#@ker! I'm the motherf&^king guns of the navarrone!" - Jules Pulp Fiction

"But if you want to be old school about it, and you know, I'm all about old school" Kill Bill Volume 2

"He looks similar to me, although I have a much better haircut." - Patrick Bateman American Psycho

"I've got two of the biggest balls you've ever seen dingleberry!" - Jay Clerks

"Try not to suck any dicks on your way to the car! Hey you! Get back here!" - Dante Clerks

Crux
04-06-2005, 02:39
I think that's all right, but I can't check as it's not actually in the bible.

Correct me if you can

TG

Ahem.

"Ezekiel 25:17

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish, and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak, through the valley of darkness. For he is truly his brothers keeper, and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger, those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know, my name is the Lord, when I lay my vengeance upon thee."


Pulp Fiction is my favorite movie ever, and that one is on the soundtrack. I know it by heart :D

Kaoslord
04-06-2005, 09:16
Sandra Bullock: Let's go blow this guy!
Sly Stallone: UP! Blow This Guy UP!

SB: Cheif, you can take this job, and shovel it!
SS: Ah, close enough.

salty
04-06-2005, 09:30
"C'mon, we're streaking!" - Frank the Tank, Old School

"Ugh, he French kissed me, ahh!" - Sean William Scott, giving mouth to mouth to Will Ferrell in Old School

"How's that for a slice of fried gold?" - Shaun, Shaun of the Dead

"If you get cornered, hit 'em in the head, that seems to work, ow" - Shaun, Shaun of the Dead

Anything said by Ed in Shaun of the Dead

"We are the Knights who say 'Ni!'" - Monty Python and the Holy Grail


Salty :)

Eldacar
04-06-2005, 10:17
"Camelot!"
"Camelot!"
"Camelot!"
"It's only a model."
"Shh!"

:D

"Look, if I went around calling myself an emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!"

:D

"Right, lets kill him first, then have tea and biscuits."
"Right."
"Oh no, not biscuits."
"Oh all right all right not biscuits, but lets just kill him anyway!"
"Right."
"Right."
(looks around)
"He buggered off!"
"So 'e has, 'e scarpered!"

:D

Monty Python. Simply the best.

alterion
04-06-2005, 11:27
in lost in space.. "half a billion pound s of hi tech weaponry and i woul dtrade it all for a can of bug spray

Chuffy
04-06-2005, 11:52
More:

"Any of you c*nts want a drink?"

I love that line, mainly because thats how I talk.

"Whats your name?"
"Well, my name is Jim, but most people call me....Jim."

"Stampeding cattle."
"That's not much of a crime."
"Through the Vatican?"
"Kinky! Sign here!"

Blazing Saddles.

"Don't be stupid, be a smarty. Come and join the Nazi party."
-Mel Brooks

The Producers (best film ever)

tzeentchgiant
04-06-2005, 11:56
I've only actually seen it once, so you can excuse my mistakes.

And besides, I was fairly close.

Anyway, I thought of another one, from a movie soundtrack if that counts

"He's a bad mutha
Shut your mouth
I'm just talking 'bout shaft
Then we can diggit"

Great stuff

EDIT: also anything from shaun of the dead, to me there is no greatest, only great.

TG

The Grand Wazoo
04-06-2005, 16:03
"Clint Eastwood? I ********* him. Ooh!"

"You're 10 seconds away from the most embarrassing moment of your life."

"What the hell does mano-a-mano mean anyway? Use your head, snapperhead."

All from Ford Fairlane. That movie is so full of great comments, I could go on and on.

Eldacar
04-06-2005, 16:15
"In the army, we refer to people by their first names! You will call me Sergeant! I will call you Maggot! Is that understood, Maggot?"

Full Metal Jacket. :D

Yorkiebar
04-06-2005, 16:44
Anything from the Holy Grail, especially the French guys:

Ok, but I don't think he'll be very interested, he's already got one, you see...
I told zem we've already got one!

Kohhna
04-06-2005, 17:17
WC Feilds; After being offered a glass of water for a hangover

"Watah? Fish F#ck in watah!"
Don't know if he said that in a film or real life

*checks pulse*Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot.


Groucho Marx

Igor: You know, I'll never forget my old dad. When these things would happen to him... the things he'd say to me.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What did he say?
Igor: "What the hell are you doing in the bathroom day and night? Why don't you get out of there and give someone else a chance?"

[Frankenstein, Igor and Inga in front of HUGE castle doors]
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: What knockers.
Inga: Oh, thank you doctor.

From Young Frankenstein

Hyperactive
Lionel in Braindead.

Benny Que: We're supposed to be normal people living normal lives. Working nine to five, going to church on Sundays: normal. Maiming, murdering, crippling park animals: abnormal
Tromeo & Juliet

Audrey Benjamin: You killed my daddy, you maniacal, media-manipulated, homicidal, hermaphrodite freak of nature!
Terror Firmer

Bletch: Do you really think people are interested in nasal sex?
Trevor: Sure, boss. It's the next big fad.

Trevor: Didn't you notice you were sitting on his face!
Madame Udder: Well, it was a bit uncomfortable but I thought it was my hemorrhoids.

Sebastian: Heidi! You've been overeating again haven't you!
Heidi: Uh, no I haven't.
Sebastian: Then explain to me why there is black forest cherry cake in your cleavage!

Sebastian: I said I wanted a 'Pendant' not a pedant!.

Meet the feebles

Piku
04-06-2005, 18:05
From my favourite Woody Allen film.

''In addition to our summer and winter estate, he owned a valuable piece of land. True, it was a small piece, but he carried it with him wherever he went.''
Boris

Countess Alexandrovna : You are the greatest lover I've ever had.
Boris : Well, I practice a lot when I'm alone.


Priest : Mercifully, God was on our side!
Boris :Yeah, I'm sure that things could've gone a lot worse if he wasn't! It
could've rained!

All from 'Love and Death'.

Beefstick
04-06-2005, 19:39
"Is this a weekd... What day is this?" -- The Dude in The Big Lebowski :cool:

The pestilent 1
04-06-2005, 19:56
"i wouldve waited an eternity for this... its over prime."
*prime lays on the floor nursing critical wounds*
"NEVER!"
*prime upercuts megatron and collapses into a coma*

:cries:

"unicron! unicron answer me! you see this. the matrix! i now possess that which you most fear!
you will do my bidding, or taste my wrath!"
*galvatron struggles to open the matrix*
"... you underestimate me Galvatron." as he turns from planet gobbling planet to planet smashing uber robot.

i love transformers: the movie :evilgrin:

(the action cues are placed there to give people who havent seen it an idea of whats going on)

warlordgrubnatz
04-06-2005, 22:04
okay ive got loads
"its tip-top" turkish in snach

"... what do you call him? wheels" wolvereen in x-men

anything from monty python

"come on in ol' painless is waitin'" preadator (whats his damn name)

" i only need to know one thing; were they are" vasquez aliens

"with those thiongs runnin' around you can count me out" hudson aliens

" welcome to the party pal" bruce willis

" i took his weapons away, both of them" bruce willis sin city

Bubble Ghost
04-06-2005, 22:47
The ultimate quip movie is, without question, The Outlaw Josey Wales. I looked up a couple of my favourite quotes from it to check the wording, and found a few more I'd forgotten about:

Fletcher: You told me those men would be treated decently.
Senator Lane: They were. They were decently fed and then they were decently shot.

Lone Watie: I didn't surrender, but they took my horse and made him surrender.

Josey Wales: When I get to likin' someone, they ain't around long.
Lone Watie: I notice when you get to dislikin' someone they ain't around for long neither.

Lone Watie [a Cherokee, referring to an Abraham Lincoln speech to the Cherokee nation]: We thought about it for a long time, "Endeavor to persevere." And when we had thought about it long enough, we declared war on the Union.

Compyraptor
04-06-2005, 22:49
"I've got no time to bleed" - Blain (Jesse Ventura) in Predator

Chuffy
04-06-2005, 23:55
"i wouldve waited an eternity for this... its over prime."
*prime lays on the floor nursing critical wounds*
"NEVER!"
*prime upercuts megatron and collapses into a coma*

:cries:

"unicron! unicron answer me! you see this. the matrix! i now possess that which you most fear!
you will do my bidding, or taste my wrath!"
*galvatron struggles to open the matrix*
"... you underestimate me Galvatron." as he turns from planet gobbling planet to planet smashing uber robot.

i love transformers: the movie :evilgrin:

(the action cues are placed there to give people who havent seen it an idea of whats going on)

No no man.

"Holy ****! What're we gonna do now!?"

The pestilent 1
04-06-2005, 23:57
and yet i have never seen that version :cries:
curse my shoddy english heritage, making me have the version that misses that one word. :(

neXus6
05-06-2005, 00:15
LoL, yeah I had the vertion with out the Holy **** to when I was a kid...but the finny thing is it took that to make it a PG. It is one of the most violent films ever, even a kid can understand that the character is dieing when it gets 3 bloody great holes blown in it's stomach smoke pours from it's mouth and eyes and then it keels over backwards.
I love the fact that my video is U rated. :p
Such a fun childhood.

hairyman
05-06-2005, 00:23
"Look sir, droids."

The pestilent 1
05-06-2005, 00:24
always got me that.
ironhide gets shot in the face at point blank range, optimus' (very impressive sounding) shots tear the insecticons to bits and it gets a "U" :eyebrows:
and "****" gets it to PG :wtf:

neXus6
05-06-2005, 00:25
Oh no the really bad one is the insecticon getting it's head crushed by hotrod and cup. That is just brilliant...and wrong for kids. :p

The pestilent 1
05-06-2005, 00:26
oh that bit is grand :evilgrin:
still, i love the screams of anguish from the guys being melted by unicrons stomach :evilgrin:

:0)
05-06-2005, 00:32
GET ON THEE CHOPPA!

neXus6
05-06-2005, 00:52
oh that bit is grand
still, i love the screams of anguish from the guys being melted by unicrons stomach :evilgrin:

LoL, yes that really does deserve the :evilgrin: .

Most of Reservoir Dogs can go into the Best Quip group. :D :cool:

Chuffy
05-06-2005, 01:12
"One shall stand, one shall fall"

"All we need now is a whole lot of energon and a whole lot of luck!"
"More than you imagine Optimus Prime!"

Transformers the movie is actually pretty traumatising for a young child, not neccessarily the violence or the swearing but just seeing your favorite toys dying...

The pestilent 1
05-06-2005, 01:13
"One shall stand, one shall fall"

"All we need now is a whole lot of energon and a whole lot of luck!"
"More than you imagine Optimus Prime!"

Transformers the movie is actually pretty traumatising for a young child, not neccessarily the violence or the swearing but just seeing your favorite toys dying...

or not seeing your favorite toy not becoming a toy for 18 years.
*strokes unicron toy* :evilgrin:

though you make a point. kids of the day must have been made of some stern stuff ( :rolleyes: )

The Grand Wazoo
05-06-2005, 04:34
"In the quiet words of the Virgin Mary: Come again?"
-Brick Top, Snatch

self biased
05-06-2005, 06:51
"what, behind the rabbit?"

***

"that's no moon, it's a space station!"

***

"we are all individuals"

***

"would you like to know more?"

piotrov
05-06-2005, 08:41
"Oh, we've got both kinds of music here: Country and Western." - The Blues Brothers

"If I have to come in here one more time, I'm crackin' skulls!" - The Breakfast Club

"If you were really trying to **** me up, you should have gotten to me sooner!" - High Fidelity

"Well **** me gently with a chainsaw." - Heathers

And just about every other line from The Long Kiss Goodnight....

nevermore
05-06-2005, 11:09
Kill em all, let god sort em out - ?

Its the end of the road Galvatron! - Rodimus Prime

Lostanddamned
05-06-2005, 11:37
Get away from her you b!tch - Aliens

It's Four In The FUNKING MORNING
It's Not Hip-Hop, Is Electro
....Cornetto - Shaun Of The Dead

You Are One Ugly MotherF@cker - Predator

Dodge This - Matrix

We're Sending You Back, To The Future -Back To The Future Pt 1

Will Someone Get This Walking Carpet Out Of My Way? - A New Hope

No ticket - Dogma

Does it say Dead N!gger Storage on my lawn?
"Who's Motorcycle is that"
"Its not a motorcycle, its a chopper"
"Who's chopper is that?"
"Its Zed's"
"Who's Zed?"
"Zeds Dead Baby, Zeds Dead"
(the best end of a film that isn't the end but should be if it was all in the right order) - Pulp Fiction

And Many Many More

The boyz
05-06-2005, 11:43
"If its a miracle, Colour Sergeant, Its a short chambered Boxer-Henry .45 calibre miracle"

"And a Bayonet Sir, with some guts behind it"

This is one of my favourite lines from a film. Its from the film Zulu.

Kohhna
05-06-2005, 11:50
You shoot me in a dream you better wake up and apologise.
Mr White

What, this cop?
Nice guy Eddy

Did you kill anybody
A few cops
no real people?
Uh-huh just cops.
Pink & White

I said, "are you gonna bark all day little doggie or are you gonna bite?"
Blonde

Eddie, If I was a pirate I wouldn't throw you to the crew.
Blonde

Piku
05-06-2005, 15:23
Cop:For the last time I don't know anything about no ****in' set up. You can torture me all you want.

Blonde:Torture you? Thats good, that's a good Idea, I like that.
Evil

also thanks to the FLC.

Riddy
05-06-2005, 17:36
"Help, help i'm being repressed" -Monty Pythons The Holy Grail

DSH-Did your mother have any children that lived?
Private Pile-Sir Yes Sir
DSH-I bet she regret that - Full Metal Jacket

"Pikeys.....i hate pikeys" - Snatch

Koraath
05-06-2005, 17:47
Do you know what nemisis means?

the righteous infliction of retribution manifest by an appropriate agent.
In this case by a 'orrible ****.

Me!

Brick top (snatch)

Warlord Gnashgrod
05-06-2005, 20:27
One of my favorites from the Film "Demolition Man"

Simon Phoenix: I must've done something right in a previous life. Can't imagine what that could've been.

Warlord Gnashgrod
05-06-2005, 20:29
And another favorite.

The Tall Man: It's NEVER over. "Phantasm III, Lord of The Dead."

neXus6
06-06-2005, 03:58
One of the best bit's from Snatch:

Brick Top: [Into cell phone] Pete, talk to me.
Darren: [Into cell phone] If ya want yer friend to hear ya, you'll have to talk a lot louder than that.

self biased
06-06-2005, 06:46
"sugar?"
"no thank you turkish, i'm sweet enough as it is."

***

"not all treasure is silver and gold, mate."

***

"just lemme find a cash machine..."

Jedi152
06-06-2005, 09:01
Hows about:

"You are without doubt, the worst pirate i have ever heard of!"

"Ah, but you have heard of me!"

Vanwatalath
06-06-2005, 09:15
"In the army, we refer to people by their first names! You will call me Sergeant! I will call you Maggot! Is that understood, Maggot?"

Full Metal Jacket. :D

Sergeant: How tall are you private?
Private: (mumbles his height)
Sergeant: I didnt know they stacked **** that high :)

Oh and from eurotrip:

"this isnt where i parked my car"

If you watched it you'll understand, and its such a funny movie

marineowar
06-06-2005, 10:06
Top Gun 2:
"You should not have come back."
"Oh yeah! Well I have!"

Chuffy
06-06-2005, 11:13
"...and Mr Pink."
"But, why do I have to be Mr Pink?"
"'Cause you're a faggot alright!?"

"I'm sorry Dave, I can't allow you to do that."

"You know what the funniest thing about Europe is?"
"What?"
"it's the little differences. I mean they got the same **** over there that we got here, but over there it's a little different."
"Example."
"Well you can walk into a movie theatre in Amsterdam and a beer, and I don't mean no paper cup, I'm talkin' about a glass of beer. And in Paris, you can buy a beer in McDonalds. You know what they call a quarter-pounder with cheese, in Paris?"
"They don't call it a quarter-pounder with cheese?"
"No man they've got the metric system, they wouldn't know what the ***** a quarter-pounder is."
"So what do they call it?"
"They call it a, Royale with Cheese."
"Royale with Cheese."
"Thats right"
"What do they call a Big Mac?"
"Big Macs a Big Mac, but they call it Le Big Mac."
"'Le Big Mac', hahaha! What do they call a Whopper?"
"I dunno I didn't go to Burger-King."

"I love you Pumpkin."
"I love you Hunny-Bunny....EVERYBODY BE COOL THIS IS A ROBBERY!"
"ANY OF YOU ******** PR*CKS MOVE AND I'M GONNA EXECUTE EVERY MOTHER-******** LAST ONE OF YOU!"

Azroth
06-06-2005, 13:11
"Where's Spoon?"
"There is no Spoon."
-Dog Soldiers.

Bloody hilarious. And of course, my all-time favourite action movie one-liner: "Jippikayey (haven't got a clue how to spell it) ****************." - Bruce Willis, all Die Hard films.

Riddy
06-06-2005, 15:27
I just remembered another one, i think its from Layer Cake:

XXX-Why dont you come over to my place and we can talk this over like gentleman
Hired Assassin-Ok
XXX-Do you know were i live?
Hired Assassin-No
XXX-Well ***k off then
XXX slams phone down.

hehe, genious.

Kohhna
06-06-2005, 23:29
Beware, beware, beware of the big green dragon that sits on your doorstep. He eats little boys, puppy-dog tails, and big fat snails. Beware, take care, beware.
Glen or Glenda

Don't worry about Lobo, he's as gentle as a Kitchen!

Home, I have no home, hunted, despised, living like an animal - the Jungle is my home! But I will show the world that I can be its Master! I shall perfect my own race of people - a race of atomic supermen that will conquer the world!
Bride of the Atom

Greetings, my friend. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future.

Modern women. They've been like that all down through the ages.

You see. You see?! Your stupid mindsó stupid! Stupid!!!!
Of course, Plan 9 from outer-space.

Piku
06-06-2005, 23:34
Greetings, my friend. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future.

Modern women. They've been like that all down through the ages.

You see. You see?! Your stupid mindsó stupid! Stupid!!!!
Of course, Plan 9 from outer-space.

Yay! Eddie.

Trench_Raider
06-06-2005, 23:51
The entire "Captain Sterne" sequence from "Heavy Metal". I can quote it from start to finish and still every time I see it I'm rolling!

"Trench Raider"