View Full Version : The Official Warseer League Match Thread

Autobot HQ
12-02-2007, 20:16

The Official League Match Thread:

Please, post your reports on any League matches you play. You don't have to, but it'll be easy for us all to keep track of the games and to respond to them all. Posting them here over a seperate thread also means they will always live on at the top of the forum, for all future plays to see your earlier matches. Game on!

President Elect of Warseer Blood Bowl

14-02-2007, 15:47
Da Rebul Fakshun vs. Sssssh! We're actually Lizards

First half
The game started with a nice full pitch, Rebuls receiving. Immediately after a strong kick, Skabteef 'Da Smasha' Snotaarg flew into Sickslay, knocking him back then disabling him with a niggling injury. He then whacked Bogend out of his way and advanced into the centre of the Lizards' line-up. Grotsnik fired up his chainsaw and further blocks and bombs knocked over Bonethief and Ter. Naffgrot picked up and fumbled the ball, giving the Lizards a chance to srike back.

The Lizards stood up and moved down the pitch, making several blocks, but Dethstain badly hurt himself, ending the turn.

Fanatic Morthug 'Da Masha' Morurty immediately charged into the Lizard lines, KILLING Bonethief, but Da Smasha was less successful, running out of Fungus juice and collapsing for the remainder of the game.

The Lizards took advantage of this to maneuver past the Fakshun's lines and make some more blocks, knocking over and then kicking Chainsaw-wielder Gobstik Snagasnaga, sending him into a coma. He is expected to miss the Rebul Fakshun's next game but then to make a full recovery.

The Rebuls then moved to cover all opponents and Naffgrot and Grubrunt got hold of the ball and began to dash up the pitch while everyone wuz busy kickin' each other.

Appearing not to notice, Sssssh! continued to attempt to inflict injuries but failed, receiving two KOs in return as Naffgrot dashed up the pitch, joining Oglug for safety.

Skabstuf was KOd but the Lizards achieved little else as Da Rebuls ran forward again, nearing the endzone.

A lot of pushing and shoving went on but unsurprisingly Naffgrot ran on to score the first TD of the game. The remaider of the first half had plenty of fighting but no lasting injuries were sustained, to the crowd's disappointment.

Deng Ham
16-02-2007, 15:39
New Zaggarund Steaks vs Tenpole Mecca WS

First Half
The game started with a rawr from the trubune. The players lined up. And fiew knocking of head the first turn. The Steaks had clearly been inspired by there heros. And Tenpole had trubble knoking the 'flings down. And to make matters worseboth Gorlaz and Xantrhaz fired up there chain saws early in the game. And the blood splatter began. But it was the 'flings that took the first real hard blow as ??? was killed.

It was Tenpole that recived the ball. But horible ball controll made shure that the ball never left the tenpole half of the pitch. And NZS came tru and scored the leading TD.

Luckely the BMW was knocked out at the end of the half. And further reducing the lineup of the tenpole. To a total of 9 players. While the New Zaggarund Steaks still coud field a full team. For the start of the second half.

Second half
The gmea restarted with a bang. Or rather a squash. As Zharzrak killed "See Emely play". And The Steaks consentrated on the fight on the line. But the Meccas was not fooled and ran around using there higher move to there advantige. Putting pressure on the quarterback "Sazag". And they woud have sucessed too if not Apache had that old shacle injury on his ancle that srung open when he puched juat a little to hard to knock down Sazag. A patch was cleard for Sazag to run up field passing th ball to The Fodderman. Him and RuggII fought there way across the field to score the second TD of the match.

A bad kick off for the NZS resultet in an open route for Worthless. Who ran for it across the pitch. Ignoring the carnige on the line. Krazakarn tryed to get after him. Dodging his way. But at the sight of fresh meat. He stumbeld and fell. And Worhtless was home free to score a TD for the Meccas.

At the last minutes of the game. Summertime was brutaly knocked to the ground. Buzz the Bomba whom had been given the task of running up field was so amazed by the sight. That he forgot to run. And that preventing the NZS to score there 3 TD of the match. Or atleast having the chance to do so. For Fodderman was unable to grab the ball. And was quickly put under pressure. He managed to get the ball up to Buzz. But as Buzz fell to a block the ball landed at the feet of Krazakarn. Andthere it lay. Despite Greases atempts to get it and throw it to the waiting slaves.

Finale score: NZS 2 - 1 TM
Finale body count:NZS 2/2/2 - 2/2/1 TM

16-02-2007, 16:17
DA Rebul Fakshun vs. Sssssh! We're actually Lizards
2 - 0

We're here today with Sssssh! Captain and lead Kicker Che, so how do you feel the match went today.

"We wis cheated, they wis kickin our guys when dey wis lyin hurtin on the pitch, dey wiz runnin at uz wif chainymajigs and blowy uppy bomby thingys dey jus weren't fightin fair see. Da ref mus ave 'ad his 'ead up is ass to miss all that. Den dey started goin fur the ball, the ball!! dey weren't playin by the rulez and thats all ave got to say, we wuz the better side n we wuz the 'onerable ones, dey is cheaterz, we'll be waitin fur a rematch anytime."

Whats your thought on the two players that died tonight?

"Dem dirty gobbos killed Greatpuke and Bonethief. Dey wis good gobbos, had families back home, dey wiz killed by cheaterz in an unfair match and i will see dey is avenged."

What about the rumors of Gobstik Snagasnaga being in a coma?

"He wis runnin at me quick wif one of dem chainymajigs so one of da boyz tripped 'im n a kicked 'im real hard, he got wit he deserved."

Well folks, some angry words from the Cheaters captain

"Oy, we is no cheaters, dat is dem Rebulz you are talkin bout"

Ok...thats all we have time for tonight, see you all next week...

:p :p

Deng Ham
17-02-2007, 13:51
New Zaggarund Steaks vs Riverside Rat Wranglers

First Half
The Steaks won the toss. And punched a hole in the Riverside center difence. Once the hole was made. The 'flings pourde in. Buzz acting as quarterback had grabed the ball and passed it to the middel of the croud on the center line. Finding the Fodderman, who catched it. Beeing full of himself for taking the ball, ignored Ratty. And was tripped to the ground, the air beeing knocked out of him.

Ratty where quick to get the ball and hand it to Alfie and headed up the field. But he was now a prime target for Ghorlaz, who had fired up his saw. And made short prosess of the scatered armour on Alfie. Sending the squig riding gobo off the pitch. Inspired by ther saw wilding mad teammate. The rest of the NZS knocked several gobos into the ground. And made shure they stayed down. Buzz once more headed to take the ball and this time it was Sputz who was his target. But Sputs failed to grab it. Gratty and Ratty headed to intercept the pass and reclaim the ball for Riverside. But they coud neither take the ball for there own. Eventualt Ratty got the ball and ran off with it. But was cought inbetween the horns of Krazakran and the buzzing saw of Ghorlaz. No need to say more, he lost the ball. Fodderman came to take it, failed, then came Alfie. Holding the ball, but scary close to the side line. It was an offer that Krazakarn did not pass off. And the ball was once more loose.

But the heavy fighting on the pitch had allmost knocked out all the goblins, only Ratty and Bubsy where left. So it was an easy job for Sputz to score the first TD of the game, and the only one in this half.

Second Half

Deng Ham
17-02-2007, 20:38
Dark Seers of truth vs Penthouse Playboys

The players run out on the field. On this wonderfull day. Here at the Mansion. 41000 drooling spectators have come to see the Girls play the Elfs. The Podles have just warmed up the crowd. Wearing there minimal costumes. This looked like it's going to be one fine match.
The Grils come running out of the looker room. All covered in oil and greas. The sun reflecting off there skin. And the male audience goes wild.

First Half
The girls win the toss. And quickly go about bashing heads. within minutes Murkey and Hostile have been caried off the pitch with injuries. The Girls groin kicks work like a charm. And Ginger had full controll of the ball. Tossing it up field to Paris. And it's a touch down.

As the players take to the pitch again. The Girls use a defensive line up. But without need. As the Dark Seers dodge off and try to run around them. the kick from Ginger is perfect. And land all the way back at the end zone. Quck moves are neede to keep on the right side of the fast rushing elfs. A fiew of them is knocke down. But too many are stil standing and capable of countering. Ginger trying to hold them off, stumbles and leaving everything wide open (her jersy too, to the joy of the spectators). This opertunety is taken by Dimmed Jim who run and pass the ball to Melancholy. And the score is now 1-1.

The goal realy upsett the PP girls. And at the next kick off. The start punishing. Never before have this mutch blood been spilt on the pitch at the Mantion. Some say that half the team had there period. But we have been unable to confirm this rumors.Starting to get heavely outnumbered. Dark Elf Dark Scrowl realized that something had to be done. He ran down to take posession of the ball. And toss it further back. In order to delay the second PP TD. Right after the ball left his hand. Lilane hit him. Knocking him to the ground. Giving Ginger the room she needed to get the ball up tp Paris. Paris then ran to the end protected by Amber. In the center of the field the girls continued to hit, claw, bite, pull hair and what not. Sending more elfs off. In a desperate atempt to stop the girls. Dimmed Jim and Opaque Hatered rushed back. But failed to take the ball from Paris. And it was one har knock form her as she pushed dimmed Jim into the waiting crowd. Angry at him for touching "there lady".

Second Half.
The Dark Seers of thruth was unablt to rock the line of the penthouse. But they did manage to create a hole. And tru it came Dimmed Jim. carying the ball and lobbing it as far away as possible. Landing in the playboy endzone. The Elfs neede to be puched back. And so the they where. Dimmed Jim was wraped up in female curves and silicone. Preventing him from running further down field. But still he managed to bounch of the soft flesh of the girls. It woud seem he had done so before. The girls however did not want him to slip out so soon. As Nicole and Trish ran to keep him within there grasp. ginger then rushed back to take the ball, and pass it up before Jim coud take it and socre. It was Melanie who stod on the reciving end of the pass. Obscure Cure came to take her dowm but too lait as she handed it off to Paris, who was on her way for another TD in this game.

The Seers where now outnumbered by almost 2 to 1. As they took to the pitch again. And it was easy for Amper to take control af the ball. She ran upfield. But Dark Scrowl came to intercept her. Puching her back. Danguresly close to the bariers of the pitch. But so too was Dark Scrowl. And Britey saw this. She ran up and blocked him off. Rignt into the pompoms of Nikita. Right after faling lifeless to the ground. What happend.. ? Ah... Nikita revealed a knife hidden in the pompom. Deng Ham, the coach of the Penthouse girls rushed over to her hand secured her way down into the looker rooms. As Amber dodged clear and headed for another Touch Down for the PP girls. The situation was dire for the Seers of Truth. The only way to stop Amber was to get as many players to her as possible. Of the four players left it was only Cramped Darkness and Melancoly Incarnated who was within range. But they failed in stopping Amber. Both Britey and Paris came to Ambers aid. and they opened up a path for her. And the score is now 4-1

In the Dark Seer Dugout Shady Character had watched his teammates being molested by girls. And at that momet he swore an oath never to feal up a girl. Even if she asked him to do so. And as he did. He continued to fake his blackout.

The Girls lined up for a flatt offence. Knowing they woud outnumber the elfs. At the kick the elfs backed away from the line. And the game had ended...

Finale score: DST 1 - 4 PP
Finale body count:DST 1/0/0 - 5/0/0 PP

A suprisingly strong victory for hte Penthouse Playboys. Both in touch downs and knock outs.

Deng Ham
20-02-2007, 14:56
New Zaggarund Steaks vs Gurlakks Gang

The Steaks where about to face off agaist there last competitor in thes turnamnet. Coach Deng Ham had been in the crowds when Gurlakks Gang played Da Rebul Fakshun. It was a bloodbath. And Deng Ham was wery happy with the next round draw. As Rebul looke a tooth sharper. But head Coach ThOr and team Chaptian Gurlakk. Had promised the NZS a real run for the points. And warned them not to take it as a walkover. The warning was taken seriously, and what else coud you expect with a team full of squigs. They eat other players as fast as the Steaks stuff down there barbeque lunch.

First Half
So the players took to the field. There was a big uproaring on the grandstands. Bottles and Steak knifes was hurled form the spectators. And nothing less than 4 Goblins, a squig and a halfling was knocked down and out byt the hailstorm of debrie. Despite Gurlakk obecting to the judge, the game played on. The judge was probably more scared of the New Zaggarund Steaks fans than he was anybody on the pitch.

The NZS won the toss and roared off first. Taking advantige of the low goblin player count on the field. knocking even more to the ground. Gurlakk was already on a uphill fight. And tryed to recover as best he coud. It was not easy as both Gorlaz and Xantras fired up there saws early. ThOr had instructed his lads to go out hard on the minos. And In that tehy sucseeded. Stunning Zharzak early in the game. Sazag took the ball up pitch in a hunt for an early score. Fumbeling the pass, the ball landing in the midts of the fighting. The big brawl was so confusing that Fortress and Gurlakks squigs started biting off his own teammates. Further reducing Gurlakks crew. As the dust setteled there where only 7 goblins, 7 'flings and both minos left on the pitch. It was now that Fodderman broke free and to alls suprize he had with him the ball. But not for long as Gurlakk himself took charge and took a bite of the stunty. Once more the was a big fight around the ball. Everybody jumping in, either to take the ball, another player or just to join the fun. The Steaks completly controling this one. Knocking all goblins to the ground and Imzerved dodged tru, grabing the ball and headed for a TD.

At the restart of the game. Fortress was pissed. He sett out to do what they had planed all along. To get them minos of the pitch. Seriously injuring Krazakran. And nothing more happened this half.

Second Half
The New Zaggarund Steaks had there minds sett on the feast ahead. If they only managed to score one more TD they had secured the win in the cup. So they lined up flatt to make to most of the fight ahead. Also outnumbering the goblins 10 to 8. It was an advantige they woud take. The goblins too had there minds sett on doing damage and to reduce the advantige of the NZS. And it was no suprise that a 'fling was knocked out already at the kick off. NZS quickly put pressure on Hurricane the ball carier. Knocking him to the ground and gaining an almost open path to the end zone. Back at the line of screamage. More blood was spilled, this time it was goblin blood. 2 more of the greenskins had been transported off the pitch. As Rugg safly picked up the ball and scored the 2 - 0 touch down for the Steaks.

At the kick off Gurlakk boys once more put the preasuer on the mino. Fortress once more knocked one of the big brutes to the ground and Spitfire came to knock him while prone. But the beast took hits and got back up. With sutch a concentration of players around Zharzrak. It was free for the flings to rush forward to secure the ball. And putting a nail in the game. Rugg was tru, with Hurrican and Fortress on his tail. Shaking them off, he got the ball into the end Zone... 3 - 0 what a performance by the short Zaggarund players.

Once more the goblins where too fiew to field a propper defence and there where noone left behind to guard the ball. T-bone was keen on scoring once more for the NZS rushing down field. Seeing the ball out in the open. He rushed for the ball. Graping it and setting off for the end Zone...

Finale Score: NZS 3 - 0 GG
Finale body count: NZS 1/1/0 - 2/1/0 GG

With this superior win. The New Zaggarund Steaks where crwoned chapions of the "Stunty Weapon Masters". Having won all there matches. And with an amazing +6 TD rating.

15-05-2007, 22:24
Now was that a game or was that a game?

WarSeers 3 vs 1 New Zaggarund Quakes

Will edit this post later, but for now I will summarise: The WarSeers are crippled. They lost THREE players in that match, and many more were out of the game. With only 10K winnings it's hard to see how they can ever recover. However, due to truly GLORIOUS heroism on the part of the brave dying elves, we won 3-1! Woooo!

And Sylass and Yorkie are still alive! :D

19-07-2007, 14:05
Th0rs House of the Dead TR/Str 165/154 Undead vs Down under high and mighty TR/Str 113/110 Human

..th0r released his necromantic fury and brought to live the team of undead. However the spell began to fade on Thunderbolt and as such was unusable for most of the game (bonehead handicap). Other notes of the game include the Iron Man streak held by Edwardo the Mighty, who performed well taking out multiple zombies with his mighty hits. The House of the Dead received a lot of negative press for this upcoming match after it had to be rescheduled again and again, and there performance on the field for the first half reflected the doom & gloom around the team.

Pretty uneventful and boring match. K2, pretty much ran away from me the whole game, letting me skill pretty much whoever I wanted (my two ghouls). I did kill a linemen but much to my disappointment the apothecary fixed him up... no new zombie for me. The second half was more of the same with k2 failing a long bomb and the Undead jumping all over it, and again the first half was repeated. The House of the Dead win 2-0, keeping on pace with the top two teams in the division. Without a tie between Messiah and Search it will be near impossible for the House of the Dead to win the championship.

Deng Ham
27-07-2007, 19:06
Badnagz Bad Boyz vs Penthouse Playboys

Official statistics from FUMBBL (http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=match&id=1781578)

It looked to be a brutal game... With the orcs hammering into soft female tissue. And the first TD game quick. As halv the PP team was caried off the pitch.

Coach Deng Ham must have given all girls plenty of compliments. And special attention. Becouse most of them got back out there. And played ball. Broke a hole int the solide green line. And dodged tru. But everytime as the ball was passed up field thre was a stupid overconfident fairybrew drinking Black orc to Intercept the ball. And holt the attack.

The second half started with a bang. And 2 orcs where sent off with damage. Woud have been 3 had it not been for a skilled Badnagz apo. And now the hole shoud be big enough. But once more. The pass up field was blocked. And the Girls had to regroup, get the ball and start over. All of the second half was on the Bad boys part of the pitch. With the PP girls puting preasure on. But it seemed that the girls failed under the preasure. And did not have the boost to give that little extra that this game required.

BBB player of the game: 'Rampage' Quinton (Black orc)
PP player of the game: Trish. For putting all that work into the game.

We cought up with team manager Dagfinn and BBB team captain 'Hollywood' Hendersun in the locker room after the game.
Reporter: How does it feal to loose to orcs. After having played well aginst the two teams that your feared the most?
Dagfinn: It was a bitter loss. We clearly had the win within reach. But the girls are tired. It's been a tight scedule and loads of work have been done. You could see it today. That the skill is there. The will is there. But not the omph.
R: So what will you and the team do before the last game in the season?
D: That is none of your buisnis, we like to keep our privet life pirvate. ;-) But the team will take some time off. For a bitt of R&R. Go to a Spa, relax, have some fun. Basicly we're continuing practice, but not so hard foucsed on playing. But to have fun and building confidence.

And we also got a fiew words from 'Hollywood' Hendersun after the game:
"Dem panzy wumen wuz good lookin', fer humies. If I'da gotten to bash them abit they woulda been prettier but dey poisoned me before da game and I missed da fun wif da ladz :-("

27-07-2007, 19:18
BadNagz Bad Boyz 1 - 0 Penthouse Playboys

An interesting match for sure. The PP went into the game with little confidence, but getting handed 3 handi's cheered them up some. They got virus which knocked a Black Orc and team captain 'Hollywood' Hendersun out of the game (combined 60+ SPP). I got to receive and quickly set about demolishin the front line of the amazons. after 4 turns I had managed to knock 5 players out, CASing 1 (rather Deng_Ham's brutal coaching was the reason for the CAS!!) and score 1-0. The rest of the half saw the amazons make a fair effort to secure the ball and break through my lines ( I had gotten perfect def.). An intercept by 'Rampage' Quinton (BO) saw the tables reversed and us almost scoring, but Deng's superb defence was hard to get thru and also the failed gfi (Re-Rolled) on the TD-line!

The second half was similar to the end of the 1st where Deng did a shotgun blitz thru my lines and almost scored were it not for another Intercept by my players (thrower). I countered and the game see-sawed in attempts at scoring but neither team could do enough for that last little push to score. 1-0 end result.

The game saw some hefty playing where both teams achieved amazing dice rolls when trying for hard dodges and intercepts (I made a total of 3 intercepts in the game!!). Paradoxically the easy 3+ or 2+ actions failed more than not. In the end a tough close game that could've ended in a win or loss. Great game Deng :)

Deng Ham
05-08-2007, 15:32
Penbthouse Playboys vs Naggorite Nevermore

Fumbbl match report (http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=match&id=1792072)
The playboys got to recive the kick. But the Elves where fast. And quickly blized up field to put preassure on the ball. But Ginger and her helpers secured the ball and pussed up field. Passing the ball in the sharp sunlight into the hands of Paris. But She was brutaly knocked off the pitch by Caemsoeorl. Dropping the ball. But Bambi intercepted the ball. And the girls sett up field Scoring an early TD.

At the kick off. The Girls were furious. After stopping Balsalriro form dodging past. The gils knocked 3 playrs off the pich. Showing we are more than just prity faces, and exposed flesh. But that did not stop Ferrylian from runing past and try to exualize. But trish ran him down. And knocked the ball out of his hands. Aimee ran to take the ball. But did not manage to pass the ball, and it was cough by Aelroneal. The Nevermore still pussing hard. But Trish once more knocing the ball out. But Candi fail to pick it up. And Lilain still waiting for the ball, as she is home free. Finaly Lilain got the ball but her high heals broke as she got to the end zone. And Mesrili sweep down to pick it up. But all the greese from Lilianes body had rubbed on the ball. And he fumbbled the trow. Candy run down and block him down as Natalie go for the ball, picks it up... AND pass it to Lilian who have recovered in the end zone. 2-0 to the naghty girls.

The Naggorite Elfs are suffering for injury and can only field 10 players in the second half. But can there speed make up for it? They started with a know pattern. Caemsoeorl blized a hole on the flank and Belsariol ran after with the ball. Now very close to the scoreing. Trish tacing full controll and blocking the cacher down. The ball bouncing off the side and down to the end of the PP part of the pich. Stacy ran to take it. But failed. And now it was nothing stoping Ferrilyan scoring. 2-1 At the re kick. The girls show once more that they have practiced the start. And that the hard maches agains the dwarfs and Chaos dwarfs have given results. Knocking out another elf. And proning several. But The fast elfs ran past an quickly put Ginger under preasure. So much that she dropped the ball. It was close as the NN ran forward. But Gigner picked herself and the ball back up and threw a magnificant pass up to Bambi. Who ran in to score her second for the match. With only 4 turns to go. And 2 Touchdowns down. It looked grim for the pro elfs. But a huge playcheck handed to the ref.. Him look the other way, and the odds a little better. But once more the Amazone defence was too tight. And the elfs fell as the dodged tru. The pay check handed the judge gave results early. As Aimee was sendt off as she tried to foul star player Caemsoeorl. NN move slowly down pich in a dwarfen fort formation. But still there is an opening for Trish to block the ball out. But a well thrown dump off keeps the ball in Naggorite hands. And Ferrilyan dodges tru to score his second of the match.. It's going to be close this game. Tho The elfs are danguresly low on players. The PP chances of the 4th goal was dramaticaly reduced when gigner failed to pick up the ball. But then Ferrilyan messed everything up for the elfs, by falling and ending the Naggorites chances of a draw. And Ginger get's the ball and pass it up to banbi who scores a hat tric this game.

Final score.
Penthouse Playboys 4 - 2 Naggorite Nevermore